What is Gratitude? Can it Really Make Me Happier?

‘We can always choose to perceive things differently. We can focus on what’s wrong in our lives or we can focus on what’s right’. Marianne Williamson.

Several years ago, now, I listened to a Ted Talk by the Monk David Steindl-Rast, in which he puts forward the theory that contrary to popular belief, happiness does not make us grateful but rather gratefulness makes us happy. Slowing down and focusing on what is good in our lives and expressing gratitude for it, at any given moment can remarkably improve our levels of joyfulness. Being curious about the theory, I decided to do a little bit of research with the intention of introducing some sort of gratitude practise into my own routine to experience first-hand, what impact, if any, it could have.

What is Gratitude?

Gratitude in its simplest form, according to the leading experts,  is an appreciation for what we have. It is a recognition that there is much good in our lives and an acknowledgement from within, that yes we are grateful and thankful for what we have and what is working well in our lives.

That is not to say that we ignore all that is not working well in our lives and try to convince ourselves that all is going swimmingly well when it clearly is not, but it helps us to gain context and avoid catastrophising which only serves to drive heavy negative emotions.

The good news is that Gratitude is a choice, we can choose to be grateful or we can choose not to be.

How can you introduce a Gratitude practice?

There are many ways to introduce a gratitude practice. In fact, there are a number of Gratitude Apps that make the whole practice really simple readily available now. You can choose to use one of these apps, or go with a simple gratitude pen and paper journal or you can introduce a gratitude meditation.

There are many times of the day that are also suitable for your gratitude practice. Many people choose the evening as it closes off the day in a positive way but after some consideration, I choose a simple morning Gratitude Meditation.

Morning Gratitude Practice - Meditation

Before getting out of bed in the morning, take 3 deep abdominal breaths in through the nose and out through the mouth, relaxing your body as much as you can.

Think of something/someone in your life that you are truly grateful for.

Hold that thought, expand it and visualise it.

Allow it to sink deeply into your mind and hold the visualisation for one minute.

Now think of a second reason to be grateful and repeat the exercise.

Repeat for the third time.

Now take 3 deep abdominal breaths, let go of all of your thoughts and begin your day. As a bonus you can add an intention here. In other words call out one word that you would like to embody for the day i.e. calm, confident, in control, whatever is most meaningful for you and call out this word periodically over the course of the day to keep you on track.

Continue to build a repertoire of things to be grateful for, changing the three things you are grateful for daily. It is not always easy to get into a grateful state of mind as I discovered early on: we may not realise it, but there is always something to be grateful for. They can be as simple as having a comfortable bed to sleep in or warm comfortable clothes to wear.

What results did I get from my Gratitude Practice?

The results were remarkable. Not immediately but after a few weeks, I noticed a definite shift in my mindset. My default was no longer to catastrophise or to get stuck in the "what is not going well", but rather to see the opportunities presented in the challenges in front of me and what was even more remarkable was that I appeared to have more and more to be grateful for as each day went by. I regularly notice now that things that happen or challenges I meet, my default is more towards what can I learn from this, or where is the opportunity here which certainly would not have been the case previously.

Our brains are wired for safety, to default to the negative and the things that aren’t going well in our lives. This survival mechanism which is part of our make-up kicks in to keep us safe. Have you ever noticed at the end of the day how your focus drifts to what you didn’t get done or what you didn’t do well as opposed to all you achieved and all you did well?

Allowing this pattern to go unchecked, can have a very negative impact on our lives and lead us down the path of deep discontent and unhappiness.

Starting the day in a positive way, focussing on and expressing gratitude for what is good as opposed to spending time focussing on all the negative things life throws out, has been proven to significantly increase happiness levels.

How could Gratitude possibly make you feel happier?

Well, expressing gratitude actually alters the Neurochemistry in the body. When we practice gratitude, we regularly evoke happy memories or at least send the brain to a happy place. This stimulates the release of Serotonin our feel-good neurochemical which does exactly that, it helps us to feel happier! Let's face it who wouldn’t want that.

Over time the focus will shift from what is lacking, to what is there in abundance and levels of joy and happiness will begin to rise. Immunity levels have even been shown to rise as a result of, a consistent Gratitude Practice.

Why not start today and reap the benefits of this simple habit.