Working from Home in Lockdown - Prioritise!

Embracing the new reality with Mum & Dad working from home and 4 kids Home-Schooling

So, it’s the new reality for now. We are all at home trying to create some sort of normality in this strange new existence. My husband who ordinarily works in the UK 4 or 5 days per week has been working from the front room for 2 weeks now. Our 4 kids (one of whom has a moderate/severe intellectual disability) are all schooling from home with drastically different workloads coming from 4 different schools. I am working from home getting used to using on-line platforms. Even the dog has a new normality with everyone crowding in on her space.
So how is it all going?
If I were to be completely honest it was challenging for the first few days. The kids were in shock at the idea of not seeing their friends, no parties and no playdates. The notion of being self-motivated and doing schoolwork themselves was daunting. My husband was working harder than ever, disregarding his movement breaks, nourishment breaks etc and emerging from the front room exhausted in the late evening. I was doing what I could to try and keep everybody happy and calm as well as trying to keep my business going. I knew I needed to dig deep and put some structure into the chaos.

Bringing in the coaching tools!

• Neurowellness coaching has taught me that as a parent you cannot underestimate the impact that your moods and emotions have on your kids. It is vital, therefore, not to over dwell on newsfeeds or continually scroll through social media as it will not only have a negative effect on you, it will also negatively impact your kids.
• As a family, it is worth spending time working out what your priorities are right now. Every family will have a different set of priorities but knowing yours, writing them down and sticking with them, is a great first step. Whether it is keeping your business afloat, holding onto your job or ensuring that the kids stay on top of their schoolwork, it is important to know your why.
• As well as family priorities, list your top one or two daily priorities for each child as well as for yourself. Achieving these over the course of the day is an accomplishment and should be celebrated. Recognising the achievements gives momentum to keep going.

The importance of prioritising self-care

• As a life and wellness coach, I know the importance of diet, exercise, adequate hydration and sleep to maintain a healthy mind as well as a healthy body. That goes for both adults and children so remembering to ensure the kids as well as adults keep a regular sleep pattern as well as getting in their daily exercise is vital in keeping them regulated. Try to get them out for a walk/run/cycle once a day.

Learn to prioritise what is important

• The idea of teachers sending schoolwork for the kids (particularly those in primary school) was not meant as another stick for parents to beat themselves with, for not adequately completing it, but rather as a guide for the kids and an aid to help keep some routine for them. Again, prioritise what you want to achieve here. Avoid comparisons and judgements with others. It’s not going to matter to your kids in the long run how much homeschooling the neighbours are doing. Do what feels right for you and your kids.

Think outside the box

• Not all home-learning is done sitting in front of a book and this is a real opportunity to allow kids to take on new tasks in the home. Handing them the responsibility to collectively come up with a fair roster that is hanging up for all to see works well as it allows them to take ownership and reduces the shock/horror factor when somebody is asked to do something.
• Do not underestimate the ability of kids to do housework and chores including cooking dinner or preparing lunch, obviously, it’s not a great idea to have the 3-year-old boiling rice or pasta but our 10 year old surprised us last week when she googled a Jamie Oliver pasta dish and cooked it from scratch.
• Adjust standards when it comes to order in the kitchen. My 13-year old made milkshakes for all the family last night. Unfortunately, I was on the rota for clean-up but I won’t go into what was involved in cleaning up the mess after her.
• Attempt to have at least one meal in the day around the table giving everyone a voice. Kids are like sponges and pick up everything, so it is important to reassure them and check-in with their thinking regularly.
• Now that the kids have no scheduled activities try to make at least some evenings memorable. A family movie is one suggestion. We brought out the deck of cards and ok there has been something close to murder on more than one occasion, but we did get some laughs also.

Practice Self-Compassion and Self-Care

• DO NOT beat yourself up for not getting it all right all of the time. Life is never perfect; we are all doing our best so show yourself some self-compassion and ensure you have a good self-care routine as we are in this for the long haul and you cannot pour from an empty jug.