Improve Your Communications Skills - Listen

Raise your self-awareness around listening skills.

How often have you been in a conversation where you know that the person with whom you are speaking – a boss, a work colleague, a family member or friend is not actually listening to what you are saying? Not listening but busy preparing what they are going to say next… reloading.
How do you feel in that situation?
Now reverse the roles. How often have you been in a conversation where you are the one reloading, rehearsing your point of view, defending your position without listening in any meaningful way to what the person opposite you is saying.
How does the other person feel in that situation?
Now imagine how it would it feel to be listened to without interruption, resistance, or imposition and equally how you could listen to somebody else without reloading?
One of the most basic human needs is the need to belong. We all want to belong but it can be difficult to belong in an organisation, community or family when we feel that nobody is listening to what we have to say.

One word that will help you improve your listening skills.

In his book “Dialogue and the art of thinking together” MIT lecturer William Isaacs uses the word “reload” to describe how we listen for much of the time.
Using this word has greatly helped me to improve my listening skills, continually asking myself whether I am actively listening or reloading. This takes lots of practice, but it gets easier and I have to say that when I really listen, I learn so much more. That I guess Is the reason that we have two ears and one mouth!
What would help you improve your listening skills?